The driving force behind all action of an individual.
You may have started the year with ideas and plans that you really wanted to achieve for 2017. How are you getting on? Are you on track and focused on your goals, ticking them off as you go along? Or, are you one of the majority of people who excused themselves from completing the set goal/plan as your motivation and interest faded around-about week 4 or 5 of 2017?
Maybe you decided to stop and start again only to stop? Did you know that setting yourself up to fail in this way can leave you drained and unhappy as you give yourself more reasons to doubt yourself, make excuses or beat yourself up and give up on your dreams?
Why does this happen? How come, the desires that we have for ourselves and get so excited about when thinking and dreaming about them become such a struggle to materialise?
1) Whose goal is this?
Why did you choose this goal in the first place? Is it something you really wanted to achieve or was it something someone else wanted you to achieve? Have you succumbed to the pressure of other people’s opinions and taken on a goal that isn’t really yours?
It is difficult to sustain motivation for something you feel obligated to do. You must own your goals as your own and take ownership for the achievement of them.
2) Not willing to put in the time and work required
When something is more difficult than we anticipated it can seem like an obstacle. In order to move past this we must recognise that anything we aren’t already good at will require our time and effort to improve. It’s not that it is not achievable, it just that it is unfamiliar. Time and effort is always required for something new to become familiar. Once that time has been taken there will be no obstacle in your path.
In this day and age there are so many things to distract us from concentrating on what we know we really should be. We have so many things competing for our attention on a daily basis. The obvious external distractions such as other people, our children, the computer, Facebook, the phone etc. not to mention when we have other priorities competing for our energy, can lead to us moving from one goal to another without actually achieving any of them.
This can only be alleviated by unplugging. Be very strict and create a written or online plan of the amount of time you can allow to be taken up by non-priority actions. Try breaking your day up into 15 minute slots and allocating time for catching up on Facebook and social activities and be very strict about sticking to those times. Keep all other available slots for priority actions only.
Learning is an active process. We learn by doing. It is unfortunate that we often forget what we have already learned and so need to be reminded.
In order to maintain a happy and healthy mind-set it is required that you go over the things that you have learnt about yourself continually. Make notes, journal, use post it notes and stick them in places you frequent as a reminder.
Only knowledge that is used sticks in your mind. I personally journal my thoughts often and yet I often forget in a moment of annoyance or frustration what I have written down previously. In order to remember, knowledge has to be practised, it has to be lived and we have to be constantly reminded as to why we are doing it. Our WHY needs to be obvious. Easier said than done I know. Which leads us to number 4?
4) Insufficient Pay Off
If you need to lose weight your why might be because you are overweight and your clothes don’t fit you anymore. As true as this may be, it may not be enough of a motivation for you to stay focused on the weight loss when your colleagues come into the office with 10 boxes of Krispy kremes and your will power takes a hike. When you are working hard or sacrificing things you love for what seems like nothing, it can be harder to stick to the plan.
Ask yourself what would be a more convincing why? Why must I stick to this plan? This is what you need to figure out. It could be for increased health benefits, or to be more attractive to the opposite sex or whatever you know is extremely important to you in your life. You have to give yourself a very convincing reason to stick to the plan. Your mind must be given a BIG reward for all of its hard work.
Focus on progress not perfection and you will see differences in the way you treat your goals.
If you have habits that seem to conflict with what you say you want, it may be that you have some underlying self-sabotaging beliefs going on. If you think this is what is keeping you stuck and you would like to explore this in more detail. Please get in touch.