As I reflect on my personal journey so far. The path of self-ownership and responsibility has been a scary and emotionally painful one.
Looking at the different aspects of the human psyche, as complicated and layered as they are, has been such an enlightening process. It is what has made the path to self-love and self-ownership just about bearable.
Now if you had asked me 10 years ago whether I felt that I was responsible and was taking control of my own life I would have given you an undoubtable yes. I look back now and see that this was not completely true.
Although in some ways from an external perspective, I hadn’t done too badly. I had already begun the work on myself and I was doing ok from an achievement perspective. 2 Houses a nice car, a decent enough job and a pretty amazing social life, to some it would seem, this was amazing and from an external perspective I am grateful and appreciate why it would seem this was the case. I’d also convinced myself that this was true. It did appear that I was someone who was taking ownership and being responsible for their life but I realise that this was only partially true.
Although I hadn’t done too badly financially and had made some pretty good financial decisions, I was still fighting and arguing with myself over many things. Decisions and actions I’d taken in the past, fear of doing and not doing things I needed or wanted to do and I was finding it very hard to let go of things that just weren’t serving me. I now realise that I had been extremely hard on myself and all of this meant that anything I achieved gave a very short lived boost. Emotionally and on a deeper level I wasn’t taking any responsibility at all. I am not sure why but I didn’t even know how to.
All of this meant I was loving parts of the process and complexities of what we call life but not all of it.
Fast forward 10 years and I see a very different story as well as a very different me.
Through many trials and tribulations I discovered and am still discovering the parts of myself that I had disowned. That is the beauty of life. That is the beauty of other people. For all their annoyances and flaws, they help you to see the part of yourself that you are not owning. When I see that someone is being what I perceive as something negative. I now realise that it is myself that I am seeing. To own that, really own it and become one with it is a technique I have been working on and developing for many years.
Something I will be sharing in an upcoming workshop.
No one says that this is easy stuff but for those that are willing to put in the not so easy work. It is damn sure worth it.
If I could share anything with anyone it is this. Love and own who you are without conditions. You are amazing. The fact that you are alive makes you so!